david adam groves

Christmas, and why I'm so darn sentimental

2011-12-06T23:15:00.001-06:00

I realized this week just how much I love Christmas. I was singing out loud in my truck carols. Really?
Yep I love Christmas. I love the smells, music, decorations....all of it.
But, most of all I love when I see my kids excited about all that too. Seems we too often as adults lose the magic. Caught up in all the gift buying and worrying about the money.
So how about this? Take a minute and remember what you felt as a kid about Christmas....just pause and take a breath. I want my kids to know that the spirit behind the giving is remembering what God did for us many centuries ago.
It's easy to lose sight of the purpose, what with all the "war on Christmas" rhetoric.
After the deep breath determine a new memory to make this year with your family. It's what they remember long after the toys are old news anyway.

In the very journey I find my destiny

2011-11-26T10:38:00.001-06:00

The Holidays bring many things. Delicious food, wonderful sentiments, and time with loved ones. I'm a hopeless romantic at this time of year.
But, for me the last couple years it's brought something else. Questions and comments from former and current family. So as to not be surprised already this year I've found myself pondering on a comment made this weekend. Someone said "you've really held things together Dave". I gave my usual "thanks, I just did what I needed to do" answer. But all day and night I thought...and thought ...and realized this one thing, I can take no credit for "keeping myself together". Truthfully, I am no different than many dad's I've met who are much, much more heroic than me.

You see, I was just like many. A "Christian Judgmentalist". You know them ...maybe you're one and won't admit to it. I'd see a guy who had a failing marriage and I'd think "what's wrong with him?" or "he's such a bad leader he can't even keep his family together". I judged. I scoffed. I never considered perhaps he was in a great spiritual battle ...and losing. And having his very soul crushed. Nope, I judged him as a loser and a failure. A failure to his departing wife, a failure to his children.

Then it happened, I was that man.
Utterly devastated, deeply wounded, feelings of betrayal, and abandonment came to live in my head.
My world was spinning ...I was faced with the greatest fear of failure...for my kids...and my future.
I certainly didn't "feel" like I was very together. No, I felt destroyed.

So back to the statement "you've really kept it together" ....
No I didn't... HE did. I knew that only pressing on holding God's hand would get me beyond the hurricane. I'm not trying to over spiritualize here, but reality is reality.
Like a paratrooper dropped into Mordor I had to walk ...and walk ...and forgive. Ignore the lies being said about me, walk and walk. Ignore the selfish decisions of another and walk and walk.
I knew if I didn't I would drown in the pain. I would never be able to fight my way back from the dead if I stopped walking. My children needed that stability ...and I cried to God to help me show them that.

Now please understand. I am not perfect. I made mistakes and I have learned so much of who I am because of it. My God have I learned. My destiny is not wrapped up in the bad decisions of others. My destiny is laying in front of me. For in the very journey I find my destiny. It's in dreams not yet dreamed. It's in love not yet realized.

So I won't be a "Christian Judgmentalist" ever again. It's not my job. It hurts others.
It's my job to be the bearer of truth. For my kids and my loved ones.
To be the giver of grace to those that don't deserve it...because none of us do.
I've been called an oak and an example to other people to press forward. But please hear me,
His Grace is better than I knew it could be. His healing goes deeper than I thought it could. His Love doesn't lose...it wins ...ALWAYS.
It's doesn't get easier, it gets simpler.

2011-11-09T10:12:00.001-06:00

Class Notes Repost:

...here are my main points from the lecture:

Regarding using video in your sermons.

1. Brief and to the point is best.

2. Quality matters (both audio and video).

3. Don’t rely only on the video (things go wrong).

4. Just because you want a video to supplement doesn’t mean you should have one.

5. Video should never replace a sound sermon.

6. Be engaging not distracting.

Tell YOUR STORY!

Nothing relates the message of the Gospel better than personal stories. The Bible is full of such examples.

“A generation ago the question was, “What is truth?” Today, the question is, “What’s the point?” -Billy Graham

Relating to the community on a level that matters to them is paramount to reaching a generation that is increasingly disinterested in all things church related.

Life "Theme Songs"

2011-10-06T21:52:00.000-05:00

Music has always been an important part of my life. OK maybe I should re-phrase that. It is woven really deep within who I am. So that being the topic I considered that my life is really a series of theme songs. Certain songs have resonated more than others and it's those that I'd consider my "theme songs".
Looking back I had to ponder. There were specific phases I went through when a genre change happened.
I remember in college so many of us were listening to all that was coming out of Seattle. Then shortly after becoming a young dad it was classic Beatles and the like British pop.
Reflecting over the recent few years I see songs being more a part than genres.

2009 into early 2010 without a doubt was Lifehouse's "Broken"
"I'm hangin' on another day
Just to see what you throw my way
And I'm hanging on to the words you say
You said that I will be OK"

Words that I hung on to, in the darkest of days. Knowing that God wasn't taken by surprise and that hope would rise.

And that leads me to mid-2010 and early 2011
United's "With Everything"
"Let hope rise And darkness tremble
In Your holy light"

In late summer 2011 ....my theme has changed,
Switchfoot "Dark Horses"
"I've made my mistakes
I've seen my heart cave in
I got my scars
I've been to hell and back again

Born for the blue skies
We’ll survive the rain
Born for the sunrise
We’ll survive the pain

[Chorus:]
We’re singing…
Hey, you can’t count us out
We’ve been running up against the crowd
Yeah, we are the dark horses
We’re singing…
Wait! It’s not over now
We’ve been down but we’ve never been out
Yeah, we are the dark horses

....Keep running for the dark horses
Hope makes the blood change courses"

Yeah theme songs they change just like the circumstances of life.
So what's yours? Time for a change?
Or maybe it's time you got one.

Being Daddy Pt.2 "What Song?"

2011-07-23T09:55:00.000-05:00

There really isn't an instruction book to being a Father. Oh I know the Bible and many great books have been written but a step by step manual there is not. I was thinking about what Henry David Thoreau said ""Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them." I thought about this and what that means for my children. How can I as daddy help see that the song in their heart doesn't go unsung?
So many times as parents we confuse activity with purpose. What I mean is lots of after school sports and activities is great ...but how does all that tie-in with the purpose or deep dreams within them? Don't stop letting them experience extracurricular events, they're important for many reasons we won't get into here, But, I want to make sure they always dream beyond what they can see just in front of them.

Did you ever imagine being something as a child and have an adult that you trusted shoot down the idea as silly? That is exactly what crushes dreams ...or buries the song deep inside us and we're too ashamed to discuss it because others might see it as unreachable or sad.
I challenge you dads, never ever tell your kids they can't achieve their dreams. Almost as bad as telling them that they're silly is being so busy that you don't listen to them and really hear what they are conveying. Put down the ipad or turn off the TV.
Show them you believe in them ...don't just say the words.

Eldredge says "The Glory of God is man fully alive".
So how can I as daddy help them lead lives fully alive? Live, dream, believe.
Trust the Father of all of us is singing over us.
That's the song in our hearts ...don't let it stay deep within.

Show your kids how to sing it ...by living your life fully alive.

Being "Daddy"

2011-07-15T19:56:00.001-05:00

I've thought a lot this week about what my greatest focus has been regarding my kids the past 3 years or so. For reasons I won't re-hash here it's something that I needed to actually "decide" awhile ago due to circumstances of life.
One word that resonated with me was "stability". Sure several other concepts for focus I thought about. But this one was the one that rose to the surface in my heart.
See whether you are a married dad or single one, this should be one of the highest priorities on your list. So what does that mean? Stability?
Maybe it means for you that as a dad you strive to keep roots down in your particular town and same school system, etc.
For me though it was much less "material related". Follow me here for a minute.
Stability meant the actions I had in responding to the negative circumstances around me. Why? Cause little eyes are watching. And how I responded was as important as anything else.
Did I always get it right? Nope. Still don't.
But, my heart knew I must take my call as a dad serious enough that I would run things through the constant filter of "what's best for them". Not what I want.
Now you say that seems pretty simple. Or maybe you think it's just being an adult.
Our society is full of dad's who don't choose anything close to stability for their kids.
Stability means... Unconditional love, integrity in the face of lies, the respect they see me show the women that interact in their lives, and setting aside personal goals for their greater good.
A more fulfilling life journey it has created for me ...honestly.

Stability leads to parenting kids that actually listen and do what's right ...because they see that example in we as dads.
Having kids that listen to you means you must first have kids that connect with you! Be fun, inspire them, believe in them, and point them to Jesus.
Stability for our kids isn't just about providing material needs. It's the life you lead in front of them that so loudly preaches the greatest sermon.

What a difference a year makes

2011-03-25T00:35:00.000-05:00

Have your ever really stopped to think about how fast a year passes perhaps after an event? Maybe for you it's the time Christmas to Christmas. Or perhaps it's a memory of a dear loved one's passing? Whether joyful or sorrow filled, time can sometimes just slip away rapidly. I was reflecting on that today. Time flies and it has little to do with anything but our own perception. Procrastination lives in the world where our sensitivity to "spiritualizing our laziness" has numbed us through.
We don't feel anymore, because we don't want to feel something if it's pain.
This is where desire dies. It can't live in that realm. It wasn't meant to.

For a long time I've studied something about myself. When I lose my desire to press into a deeper spiritual walk it's not because I simply got discouraged ...it's that I was strategically setup.
We are opposed in this life. That is not accidental.
"The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn't exist."
- The Unusual Suspects

When we abandon our desire ...we have unsuspectingly given in to the very opposition we thought we were defeating.

Never give up ...it's time to dream again. It's been a year.

Contentment?

2011-01-22T22:47:00.001-06:00

I've been thinking about the word contentment lately. It's official definition is "the state of being contented; satisfaction; ease of mind." Yikes! When have I felt much at ease of mind?
I guess I saw it maybe as a failing position in life? You know, I thought to be content is to be complacent or satisfied? Seems that society teaches a similar thought. You know "never stop going full steam ahead." "Keep striving for that brass ring!" lol
So where does God stand on this? Well 1 Tim. 6:6 says "But godliness with contentment is great gain."
So not contentment alone. But godliness with it. It's not enough to be godly. And only being content ...it won't gain you anything either. The two are needed simultaneously.
Seems that Paul was on to something here huh?
I think the reason I've been thinking about this is I sometimes feel like I don't know where things in this life are headed. And I can feel very far from any state of being content. In 2011 I have a desire to be content. I think it's God given ...if nothing else it's heart derived.
Because I don't think any of us can step into the next season He has for us without first being truly content in the one He has us in NOW.
My prayer for you is that you would find His joy, wisdom, favor, and contentment ...this week, month, and the year to come.
I'm a work in progress ...

Rescuing a Heart from 2010

2010-12-22T10:19:00.001-06:00

At the end of the year so many times we write reflective letters or cards to commemorate the year that was. Including the simple life accomplishments and small and large victories. I had no intention of doing that this year. You, that know me well, are aware that 2010 was far from victorious for me. Without being dramatic it was without a doubt the worst personal year of my adult life. And I'm not here to lament about that. I will say that growing closer to my children and learning more of their hearts has been a great positive.
But as I gave thought to the year, I wanted to at least be able to take a thought or lesson learned from what this year was. And that's when I realized that more than anything I had learned the importance of protecting and looking out for my own heart.
Rescuing it really from what this year tried to crush it with.

I have learned that as the Bible so plainly states it ...we must protect our hearts for it's the wellspring of life. I can say that the arrows that were shot at mine weren't of cupid's doing but that of a sinister spiritual enemy who sought to destroy. With betrayal, selfishness, and abandonment.
Rescuing my heart from the grasp of this destructive force was a conscious choice. Otherwise I'll never be able to move forward towards any kind of a future personally.

If I can speak to anyone that feels like their heart is un-mendable, or too crushed to ever live again ...it doesn't have to be.
God really did make us to live for so much more. More than we imagine. You can forgive and live.
You can stand again and believe in hope once more. You can rescue your heart from the enemies camp. Because God placed His story inside you that he wants told. But it only is told from within your heart.
It doesn't get easier ...but it does get simpler.
Merry Christmas and yeah for 2011!!!

The False Self Deception

2010-09-16T14:03:00.000-05:00

I'm through with false self! You know the guy that we portray to the world that is a facade of the real us? Now I learned of the definition from the writings of Eldredge. So I give proper credit. But until you really experience something that shakes your world-view...I don't think you see the false self exposed.
In this world, that is social media obsessed, no doubt the false selves are easier to maintain. Feeding the animal though is unreal. Because it's living a lie. And when you live a lie you have to keep up with the lies to keep from being found out. So the games are played, and you never really live in a world that makes sense.
This is where God steps in. I experienced the crossroads where He met me on this. I could choose to be less than real or not really care what people thought and be who I am.
See our delusion of grandeur is that we can actually live this way. Hey it's not living ...it's existing.
God shakes us to the core and forces us in to a shift that demands we choose. He won't wait until it's convenient or until we stop spinning the plates. He meets us on this subject when it's inopportune.

I'm through with false self ...he can't live here anymore.

Heart

2010-06-28T12:42:00.000-05:00

The heart is the well spring of life...so it should be of no surprise to us when the enemy uses the most inopportune times to fire arrows into that heart. In an effort to deplete it of the very thing that was so difficult to obtain. Grace and Margin for those times my friends is the prayer.

Someone asked me yesterday what brought on this post on my Facebook this week. Actually I think it's been a culmination of many months of thoughts, decisions, and life lived.
Really why do we get surprised when we face a big hurdle and the tide seems to be against us? I used to get very frustrated. Almost feeling that I was getting ripped off in those times. I mean I was doing what I knew to do as right ...but the arrows came still the same.

Jesus had great concern for the matters of the heart ...He knew that this was the battleground for the enemy. Matthew 5:8 in The Message "You're blessed when you get your inside world—your mind and heart—put right. Then you can see God in the outside world."

So I find myself asking for what I call margin. Just that space ...filled with grace and mercy. For when the arrows come ...cause they will. So we can't lose heart ...stand in that grace ...the margin. That's really where for me, Faith meets reality.

Travel Thoughts Rewind... from Zambia

2010-05-31T14:27:00.000-05:00

Been on the road ...err the air the last week from Canada to Zambia. Today we spent time at Miracle Life Church in Lusaka, Zambia. It's exciting to see the hunger of the people here for the things of God. Tomorrow we will spend time at a minister's conference then some time taping broll of the countryside hopefully. Plenty to come on that but ...
Here are some observations that I have made concerning overseas travel. Some are from my blogging from last year at this time ...and a few I have only recently learned.

-Bottled water is my friend.
-Internet access is always more expensive at the hotels with more stars after their name. Seriously this is something that is really ridiculous.
-No place in America is the traffic even close to how bad it is in Jakarta Indonesia. LA, NY and Houston combined are no comparison.
-A wool suit is not a good idea in Bangkok.
-Eating a Mowpani worm on a dare from a missionary kid is a dare I will take.
-My electric razor dies every time I go to Africa!
-Samoa is Hawaii 100 years ago (before the touristy stuff )
-More and more places are discontinuing postcards.
-It’s harder on the body’s internal clock going east across time zones then going west.
-I love Polynesian/Asian cuisine!
-My rep as a degenerate coffee drinker has led to everyone giving me coffee beans and getting me to the best coffee shops in their city wherever I go!
-I am not interested in a Fish Spa.
-The closer to the equator you get …the better your sunscreen needs to be.
-I am a huge fan of instant coffee. As long as it's the Sbux Via I brought with me

And on a more important note:
We need to daily pray for the challenges that our missionary friends are dealing with …that they would have favor with leaders and have their financial needs met.

The Danger of Hope Lost

2010-05-16T16:53:00.001-05:00

I do really believe that there is nothing more dangerous to your heart than when you truly lose hope. I think we all can point to a time in our lives where we really questioned the trajectory of our life. We question the quest or journey we are on.
When confronted with unexpected bumps in the road and failures along the way we ask the dreaded, "How did I get here?" It seems that is when we are in the gravest place of losing hope. Deep within our hearts we find that this is a crushing blow. If our heart loses that hope what then?

The very existence of our dreams seems to be teetering.

I'm reminded of the Fellowship of the Ring quote by Tolkien "The Quest stands upon the edge of a knife. Stray but a little, and it will fail ..." Losing hope in one’s heart means leading a life with no purpose. We catch ourselves muttering "what does it matter". So how does one choose to not lose hope? Even when things beyond our control have hammered us? Or people have betrayed and hurt us?

Finding joy.

What? We have to find joy? What does that mean or look like? I like what C.S. Lewis said

"All joy...emphasizes our pilgrim status; always reminds, beckons, awakens desire. Our best havings are wantings."

To once again have desire for hope,life,… even to dream we must choose joy. Because it's there that God beckons us to this divine conspiracy awakening our spirit to His desire ...for our dreams.
In Jeremiah 29:11 NCV ..."I know what I am planning for you," says the Lord. "I have good plans for you, not plans to hurt you. I will give you hope and a good future."(emphasis mine)

So hope is lost ...when joy cannot be found. Desire for dreaming is missing when joy is forgotten. Nothing is harder in my experiences than finding joy. But, I know I cannot change what I cannot control but I can control what I set my heart to.

Once again C.S. Lewis writes "The very nature of Joy makes nonsense of our common distinction between having and wanting."

I believe joy can be elusive ...it needs to be sought after. But finding joy makes all the difference.

What Legacy as a Godly Man ...?

2010-05-10T20:17:00.000-05:00

For a long time I'll admit I've wrestled with this subject. What does it mean to lead in this area? Legacy is defined as "handing down to another". While I can say with certainty that I would want my children to have a legacy from me that was positive I can't say that I always have fully understood how to exactly achieve it.
We are in a Christian subculture with formulas and cliche' sayings that fool us all into thinking that we can just read a book or take a class and presto ...good to go.
Truth is navigating this life parenting and striving to give my kids an example of what a "Godly Man" looks like isn't easy. It also isn't easy to always clearly communicate to my kids what I want them to understand ...after all, they're kids and they can't always grasp it.

So what keeps me awake at night? My seeking the face of God to guide me here ...in this confusing and distracting world. If there is one thing to know about me is that I read ...a lot. And in the Sacred Romance, Brent Curtis and John Eldredge point to the attacks of the enemy towards our soul and spirit as "arrows". Some are flesh wounds, while others pierce deep and get lodged in our hearts. What is the mistake is not taking that wound to Jesus ...admitting and asking Him to be the healer.

See I can't be a whole person to parent or be a friend or a son ...if I don't allow Jesus to heal and remove that arrow. Only He can fill the void in my soul. Only He can lead me in the path that enables me to instruct and raise my children right.
It's in this moment that I can stand against the onslaught of the arrows ...and it's this reaction to it that shows my kids the legacy to be remembered as they embark in this journey. I choose to be the standard bearer for their sake.
It's what God has called each of us who parent to do.
And by the way ...I am still learning and stumble at this like everyone.

End of the Hiatus

2010-04-29T23:35:00.000-05:00

After a long hiatus ...I return to the blogosphere!

I've been giving a lot of thought to what it means to understand others. Literally when can we say that we extend enough grace to others never considering what it's like to "walk in their shoes". I know that I preach to myself when I say that I have not reserved judgment towards people too often...until we deal with similar issues. Well, then we want all the mercy and understanding of others don't we? Now I realize that everyone is responsible for their actions ...that's not what I'm relating to. What I am specifically referring to is when we come off as though we have it all figured out. When we see a friend dealing with difficulty we are quick to forget what it's like sometimes ourselves. Isn't this what Jesus was talking about when he told the parable of the sower?

The seeds we sow when we are feeling good ...are often reaped when things get dicey. That's when we must continue to press through and withhold judging the situation of others ...remembering that the greatest commandment is to love God ...and secondly love others like we love ourselves.

I want to extend grace ...cause I so often require it in return.
And I don't have it all figured out ...it's not my job to.

Recent books I've read and why

2010-01-13T23:13:00.000-06:00

I'm not going to go into review mode. However, I wanted to share some thoughts on some recent reads and offer suggestions if you are in the mood to read and maybe learn a thing or two.

-"The Kid Who Climbed Everest"- Bear Grylls
Yeah he's the guy who eats rats and generally trudges around jungles for his survival show. But, before all that he fulfilled a dream to get to the summit of Everest. This is that journey and I enjoyed it immensely. Couldn't put it down 'til I had it read!

-"No More Christian Nice Guy"- Paul Coughlin
Thanks to my friend Shea for recommending this one. I feel very strongly about the culture's role in making men less masculine and relegating them to a "stupid buffoon" and irrelevant in the church. This book addresses the need for men to be good ...not always nice.

-"Love and War"- John and Staci Eldredge
Simple description from this book is that marriage is a "perfect storm". John and Staci detail the trials and battles that we deal with in marriage. And what we can do to create a healthier marriage.

I would love to hear feedback from you if you have read any of these books or any thoughts you have on recommended books.

Book review "Primal- a Quest for the Lost Soul of Christianity", by Mark Batterson

2009-12-22T11:08:00.002-06:00

Book review “Primal” by author Mark Batterson

Mark Batterson asks the question “What would your Christianity look like if it was stripped down to the simplest, rawest, purest faith possible?” In the new book “Primal, A Quest for the Lost Soul of Christianity”, Mark Batterson takes us on a journey into the past to see what the early Christian church imagined this walk with God should be.

He challenges the reader to look at oneself to see if we’ve cluttered our Christian walk with traditions and meaningless things and lost the passion, wonder, curiosity, and energy that the early believers were willing to give their lives for. Mark points out that God wants us to worship him not only with our memory but also our imagination. And he adds that half-formed imagination is a spiritual shortcoming in the church. Instead the church should be made up of the most imaginative people in the world!

I found this book full of challenging questions. Mark dares to ask the question why?

Why can’t a body of believers have a thriving coffee shop and give all the profits to missions?

Why can’t we as Christians have a "Holy Curiosity" as did the great Da Vinci?

Mark pulls no punches when he says “As salt and light, we cannot afford to take potshots at our culture from the comfortable confines of our Christian subculture”. He adds, “We need fewer critics and more creators”. We aren’t to water down the Gospel for creativeness’ sake. But, instead have the courage to incarnate the Gospel in creative ways not just maintain the status quo.

I believe that the first book any Christian reads in 2010 needs to be “Primal”. If we are going to really be relevant to our world we need more people asking challenging questions and finding better ways to reach the lost and dying. Mark Batterson does that in this new release.

Primal is an easy and engaging read. Mark intertwines personal stories of struggle, failure and success and does so with a passion for finding better ways to disciple and reach out.

There was a dream that was Christianity by the early church …

In the new release “Primal” Mark Batterson challenges us to rediscover the compassion and excitement for our faith once again.
Thank you to Waterbrook Multnomah for providing the complimentary copy for this review.

Make this year's holidays different?

2009-12-16T10:19:00.000-06:00

Kinda funny ...or sad really how everyone runs around being festive for festivity sake and never slows the train down enough to really take-in the season we are in.
This is my 34th Christmas. 11th as a husband, 9th as a father. And to say that I have the recipe for the perfect holiday is far from accurate. But, about 3 years ago my wife and I had an epiphany of sorts.
What if we stopped the madness? I mean really halted things during the holidays?
No driving ...more staying still. Create memories with our little family.
So I offer this as an example. You might say "sorry man that won't work for us." Or maybe you can take a little idea and mold it in to a family tradition of your own.
I know some of you do something like this ...and I commend you for beating me to the idea.

What if this year .... we didn't drive hours someplace only to turn right around shortly and drive right back...?
We lit a fire in the fireplace and played Sorry, Clue and other various boardgames way to late ...?
Rent movies we always wanted to see at the theater but missed years ago ... stayed in pajamas all day, ate sushi we fixed at home together. Slept late repeatedly. Snacked all day ...
Stared at Christmas lights and prayed for snow ...?
Turned off the newscasts ...?
...Popped popcorn and ate peanut brittle and fudge before lunch. Drank way to much coffee ...? Didn't take on any major "home improvement projects"? Baked "Birthday Cake for Jesus", watched the Nativity, and read the story from Luke on Christmas Eve ...
Turned off the cell and computer ... told stories to the kids of when I was their age ...(and watching their faces react to the idea of my being their age ever!)
Didn't try to solve family problems ...
Played old Nintendo games while the little ones giggle at mommy beating daddy at Mario Cart.
Laugh as my kids pound on pots and pans running in the yard at the stroke of midnight New Year's Eve ...
...Create memories ...that my kids will tell their kids ...
Loved more ...argued less ... ponder about all God has given me ...and thank Him ...
What if?

New Book Review Coming ...Mark Batterson's "Primal"

2009-12-11T10:14:00.000-06:00

Just received a new book to review.
Excited to begin reading the new release from Mark Batterson "Primal, a Quest for the Lost Soul of Christianity".
I will be posting a review in the very near future.
Hope everyone is close to having your Christmas shopping done!

Stay tuned ...
D

The tunes of the week ...

2009-12-05T10:42:00.000-06:00

I was thinking about my music listening habits this week and decided to share what's spinning in the jukebox. What are you listening to this week? Love to hear new suggestions.

-Jars of Clay "Christmas Songs",
I like the new version of Drummer Boy. Christmas Time is Here and Winter Skin are nice. I saw their Christmas Concert a couple seasons back ...good new songs too.

-U2 "No Line on the Horizon"
Still spinning this one ...doesn't get old.

I want to hear from you ...what's your faves?

Blog Rewind- "Listening for Whispers" ...

2009-12-01T12:27:00.000-06:00

Originally posted Mar. '09
When I worked in Christian radio about an ion ago I liked the band "Lloyd". They had a song called Listening for Whispers ...the central premise was that we are so busy trying to see the big picture ...we are missing the simple. Busy making a buck that we don't see the pain around us ...So worried about creating a big ministry that we forget about those close by that need help.
"We are listening for whispers while we cannot hear the screams".
All the trends currently are pointing to society wanting a more sense of local community. That is where we have to pay attention and provide that local ministry that they are wanting for their family in these turbulent times.
So listen for the whispers ...see those hurting folks around us that sometimes just need us to show them hope ...especially when they aren't seeing it very many places right now.

Are we defined by our gratitude?

2009-11-24T08:41:00.000-06:00

It's cool this week to have a post about thankfulness. Tends to be the default at a holiday. But, in an effort to not be maintaining the status quo I offer this question:
Are we defined by our gratitude? Do our actions reflect the premise that we believe what we profess on our t-shirts? I know that many sermons will or are being preached this week on thankfulness for the blessings we have. (so plenty of reminders there) But in being thankful are we being the blessing? Not are we blessed?
In the US we do have so much ...so are we being servants of the Gospel or just thankful for "what we got". We find the greatest blessings not in what we obtain, but in what we give out of grateful heart.
What defines you regarding thankfulness? Do you say you are thankful but actions reflect different?
So as you gather for turkey or whatever ...think about the gratitude adjustments we all need to make from time to time. I am preaching to myself on this one.
Happy Thanksgiving

Blog Rewind

2009-11-20T13:21:00.001-06:00

Blog Rewind

Originally posted Wednesday, April 1, 2009 by David Adam Groves

Connection ...leadership ...and how many friends??

I have been preparing for my classes that I teach this term on Media and Ministry ...and I have these insights that I wanted to blog.
-Number 1.
Connection is all people talk about ...but few fully understand it.
What I mean is everybody is facebooking, tweeting or in general social networking crazy! (those that aren't, are a shrinking minority) But, do we really grasp the magnitude of this? Can we really say that we are friends with this many people? Some think so ...I prefer to see it as a great way to stay in touch and keep some connection to people that I respect and want to learn from.
-Number 2.
Leadership is at an all time low in our world! Seriously! Can you ever remember when we have had so much indecision by our business leaders and so on? I've heard it said that 90% of people would prefer to follow ...and 10% want to lead. So if that many want to follow ...they'll follow someone even if they are being led in a bad direction!
-Number 3.
The church must embrace people's desire to connect! Essentially shunning social media ...or worse staying stuck in the old ways of doing things (same old media adds, print, etc) is only going to make people think that much more that the church isn't interested in being relevant.
-Number 4.
Knowledge is essential.
If we constantly stay educated and well versed in the latest methods of communication we will always have better answers for those who are searching. The church should lead not follow. Enough excuses that we don't have time ...or don't have the staff ...or the funds!
Think creative ...and ask God for wisdom to help beyond the limitations that we place on ourselves.
All for now,
God Speed

Thoughts on Using Media and how it relates to the sermon

2009-11-11T16:23:00.002-06:00

As promised to the class today at RBTC ...here are my main points from the lecture:

Regarding using video in your sermons.

1. Brief and to the point is best.
2. Quality matters (both audio and video).
3. Don’t rely only on the video (things go wrong).
4. Just because you want a video to supplement doesn’t mean you should have one.
5. Video should never replace a sound sermon.
6. Be engaging not distracting.

Tell YOUR STORY!
Nothing relates the message of the Gospel better than personal stories. The Bible is full of such examples.
“A generation ago the question was, “What is truth?” Today, the question is, “What’s the point?” -Billy Graham
Relating to the community on a level that matters to them is paramount to reaching a generation that is increasingly disinterested in all things church related.

Does your method matter?

2009-11-10T10:12:00.005-06:00

Does your method for reaching the outside world resonate or not?
I submit the following:

1. Be open to re-think.
Be willing to re-think your methods and assess whether they are being done because they are effective and not just because that's the way you've always done it!
2. Realize change is constant.
More changes than technology, the means by which people want communicated and ministered to does as well ...nearly daily.
3. Everyone is a consumer.
Like it or not people don't always choose a church or ministry to support because they are being led by the Spirit to do so. More often than not it's no different than how they choose their favorite coffee or grocery store. What's convenient, friendliness, and modern approach are far bigger reasons people make decisions on.
4. Reinventing how we communicate isn’t sinful, it’s essential!
Seriously do we even need to talk about this?
5. The message stays the same the method doesn’t!
What worked for my parents and their mega church going friends is not going to appeal to the culture today. You can't keep the Gospel packaged in 1970's wrappers and expect the current generation to see it as relevant to their lives.
6. It never stops being about people!
The second any organization loses sight of this is the exact moment that it has lost it's way. People, not your personal philosophy, are what makes ministry. Start understanding the needs of people right in your daily world and find out what are the issues they face. It's more than just a mission statement or catchy slogan that matters. It's meeting people right where they are with God's love.

What ones can you add to the list?

Getting things done

2009-10-21T12:34:00.003-05:00

I just finished reading John Eldredge's "Walking with God". (I know I have been slow lately getting my reading on) Anyway, one line in the book stood out and has made me ponder for days now.
Essentially John said he came to the realization that he didn't live, rather he just got things done.
Wow, you might as well have hit me in the head with that hardback book! That is exactly how I feel sometimes ...honestly too much of the time. Just gettin' things done. Create a plan, act on it, mark it off the list, on to the next. Don't get me wrong ...getting those very tasks done with excellence (I am a perfectionist which might explain all this) But losing myself in the busy forest ...and not seeing the trees.
Seriously this can be a real snare of the enemy. Keeping so busy that we don't live life. I know that it's caused me to take a look at the areas that I don't slow down and think about purpose and goals. Not just accomplishing tasks for accomplishment sake.
How does this make you think? Or reflect?

Where did summer go? No really ...where did it go?

2009-08-07T16:21:00.002-05:00

Where did summer go? No really ...where did it go?
The kids are getting ready for school which seems to begin sooner every year. It intrudes upon the great respite unlike when we were all kids when it seemed we never started before Sept.
But I have to admit we can't have college football soon enough! For some reason this year I am anticipating the upcoming season more. Maybe because my favorite of the four seasons is football. Or because I always miss the cool temps of growing up a child in the mid-west and seeing the leaves fall ...
Either way ...I have deviated from a more deep and thought provoking blog this week to say bring on the pigskin!

God speed,
D

Ah Ha! Moment of the Week

2009-07-10T14:13:00.006-05:00

My wife calls these "ah ha!" moments...

"Why?" A simple question I asked my team this week. When it comes to creating, or any other process in your ministry or on your job ...why do you do it the way you do it? More importantly, what is the answer?
Sometimes the answer shows that we have a good process for the program, event, etc.
But when the answer is the dreaded "That's the way we have always done it." Then I think it's time to re-think.
So much of the time we have just followed what someone else has lined out for us. The process ...the style ...the whatever.
I know that for me I have felt the need to ask this question in more than how it relates to work.

Why do I approach my walk with God the way I do? Why do I pray in the manner I do?
What about my daily devotions? Why does it look the way it does?
So much of the time are we the most worried about whether or not those prayers get answered because we just need something? I'm honestly beyond that ...seemed like that was a concern for me once. Now it's more this gut-wrenching, crushing, heaviness in my heart ....that I am not getting any closer to my Father ...instead I've reduced myself to a "give me God" so called Christian.
Only concerned about God when I want something or in dire straits.
I can't be that guy anymore. I loathe that guy. My heart wants to be a warrior's ...but I come to the king's court acting like a peasant.

One of the most over used phrases in Christendom is "personal relationship with God". I think we've heard it so much we have forgotten completely what it even means. It means more than vending machine "give me" Faith. No it's walking more than daily with God. It's second by second. Not some weird religious, flaky thing.

We ask God to use us, guide us ...then when things don't go as we planned them ...outside our little box ...we do what a friend of mine calls "trying to get it all back to normal". News flash ...there is no normal.
This was my "ah ha!" moment this week.
My normal ...is non-existent. I don't want to live the lie that is normal ...cause it isn't real.

Greater Focus?

2009-06-27T09:37:00.003-05:00

No one can make you focus. No one can make you do what you don't want to do.
A little back story:
A while back my wife and I both felt that we were being led of the Lord to get out of debt. It wasn't easy ...because we had to say no to ourselves a lot. No eating out, no unnecessary spending and so on. Others treated us like we were missing out on so much! Yes we were ...more debt like them!
Now that hard decision has proven to be a real blessing. It's a great thing to see what truly focusing on something can do. It taught our kids that responsibility with money and how we spend it is of huge importance.

So much of the time we ARE focused ...on things that are not important at all. Worrying about what others think about us. Or how we appear ...having stuff to impress others.
All of that which matters little. That's what we spend most of our time focusing on.

Why? I think that in today's modern world we are obsessed with appearances. The Bible says in Matthew 6:21(Message) ...The place where your treasure is, is the place you will most want to be, and end up being.
I think where you place your focus is directly connected to what you treasure.
Makes sense doesn't it? You value what you place importance on ...and focus on that.
I have been very bad at focusing on what doesn't matter ...more than I would like to admit.
To man up and change our focus is the challenge. Ask God for His guidance to have the Greater Focus we need. The greatest realization that I have ever had is ...I can't do this on my own.
Through my own ability I will fail every time.
This journey is complex. This journey is always challenging.
Greater focus ...for what really matters on this journey is what I am striving for.

Thank You's

2009-06-12T14:58:00.004-05:00

I want to thank all of you that attended the MLH Conference this week. Great questions and I hope that my team and I were able to help with understandable information.
Sometimes the hardest part is trying to keep it simple but at the same time worth your while.
Don't hesitate to be in contact with any questions regarding the material that was covered.
Things are busy and I will do my best to post again shortly.

God Speed,

D

Conference notes and such

2009-06-09T13:27:00.002-05:00

We are in the midst of MLH -Minister's, Leadership, and Helps Conference ...and as promised here are some followup notes for the classes:
I will be updating as I teach the classes this week.

-Technology is always changing and the only way to stay relevant is to keep in the know.
(Great leaders are readers)
-Our culture's language is Media
-It's all about the people ...staying connected to them as a church leader is essential. People attend and remain at a church because of connection to friends. Twitter, Facebook and the like are excellent tools.
-People most of the time decide whether to return to your church before you finish your first worship song.

Observations

2009-05-07T14:11:00.001-05:00

Observations …
As many of you know I just returned from a whirlwind trip around the Pacific Rim/SE Asia. Eight countries visited in less than 2 weeks. Thailand, Indonesia, Samoa …just to name a few. I recorded various video segments for the ministry and had a chance to taste the local cuisine as well. This isn’t my first trip abroad …but this is my first stab at listing the obvious and some new revelations!
Here are my observations from this trip and a few are surprising:
-Bottled water is my friend.
-Internet access is always more expensive at the hotels with more stars after their name. Seriously this is something that is really ridiculous.
-No place in America is the traffic even close to how bad it is in Jakarta Indonesia. LA, NY and Houston combined are no comparison.
-A wool suit is not a good idea in Bangkok.
-Samoa is Hawaii 100 years ago (before the touristy stuff )
-More and more places are discontinuing postcards.
-It’s harder on the body’s internal clock going east across time zones then going west.
-I love Polynesian/Asian cuisine!
-I am not interested in a Fish Spa.
-The closer to the equator you get …the better your sunscreen needs to be.
And on a more important note:
The growth of the Christian church is growing rapidly and we need to daily pray for the challenges that our missionary friends are dealing with …that they would have favor with leaders and have their financial needs met.
-The hunger for God’s Word is very pronounced in these countries.

All for now ...Godspeed

Create something today.

2009-04-15T08:07:00.003-05:00

If you're like me you get bogged down from time to time with all the tasks due and what is expected each day. So it's easy to forget the important things ...
Today Create.
Take a moment over a cup of coffee and let your brain think out of the box. What can you do that is unique and new in ministry to better reach those around you?
Rethink your marketing? Rethink your strategy for appealing to the community?
As an individual what can you do today to shine the light of Christ to a growing skeptical world?
When you do this you'll get some ideas that are going to take time to implement ...but getting the ball rolling forward with progress is imperative.
Don't get discouraged. Don't get overwhelmed ...
Create something today.

My Favorite Apps free from the net

2009-04-03T08:10:00.002-05:00

Ok, so I promised my students that I would give my opinionated listing of free apps from the internet that I like and or use the most. While there are so many more that I am researching, this is for now. These are ranked in importance or most use by myself. Please comment back as to what ones or others that you like using.
10. Facebook- While it has become very mainstream to use it ...it's still a great way to stay in touch and network.
9. Gmail- I didn't really use this until I started blogging. One of the easiest interfaces for webmail.
8. YouTube- My first stop ...although there are better quality options ...this one is still top choice.
7. Skype- I have used this a lot when traveling overseas. I love that it's even more reliable than the earlier versions ...and that it's free!
6. You Version- Easy to use Bible app ...makes my Blackberry more anointed too.
5. People Browsr- Just discovered and love the way that it makes twitter more useful and organizes my lists of networked friends.
4. Hulu- I have been using this for well over a year (even before their big add campaign) it's my top choice for watching many of the newest shows ...and classic ones from when I was a kid!
3. Blogger- I know that there are other options ...but for now this is the one that I use for blogging.
2. Filezilla- For now I use this as my quick way to transfer web content to ftp and websites.
1. Twitter- No surprises here. I am big on this app and will continue until I find a better way to update my Facebook AND my blog at the same time.
Honorable mentions-
Ping, Delicious, and Tidal TV

Connection ...leadership ...and how many friends??

2009-04-01T08:26:00.005-05:00

Listening for Whispers ...

2009-03-07T21:48:00.004-06:00

When I worked in Christian radio about an ion ago I liked the band "Lloyd". They had a song called Listening for Whispers ...the central premise was that we are so busy trying to see the big picture ...we are missing the simple. Busy making a buck that we don't see the pain around us ...So worried about creating a big ministry that we forget about those close by that need help.
"We are listening for whispers while we cannot hear the screams".
All the trends currently are pointing to society wanting a more sense of local community. That is where we have to pay attention and provide that local ministry that they are wanting for their family in these turbulent times.
So listen for the whispers ...see those hurting folks around us that sometimes just need us to show them hope ...especially when they aren't seeing it very many places right now.
Godspeed,
D

Friendship

2009-02-03T09:04:00.002-06:00

Just over two weeks ago I had started another busy day at the office when I received a call that shook me. My friend Ron McClelland had suddenly passed away at the very young age of 33. Some of you knew Ron as the talented musician from the Christian band Story Side B. I however was very privileged to know him as a ministry colleague before that.
In the early part of this decade Ron and I both joined the staff of a large church in SE Texas at about the same time. He was the music guy and I the media guy. We hit it off right away. He was a Michigan fan and I an Ohio State fan. He and I were the same age and had wives named Beka! We had also just moved a long way from home ...But more than that, we both had a heart for ministry and loved our families.
What truly was the watershed moment this week for me wasn't the age he passed (I also am 33) it was that I hadn't stayed in as close contact as I should have. We both had moved to other areas of ministry and the country ...and I talked to him maybe once or twice a year. (And I hadn't talked to him recently.)
What I realized is that I need to make the effort to be a better friend. Now I know that sounds cliche' but I really felt that. We are all busy with life, career, etc.
But there is always another game to go to ...another dance lesson to drive kids to, another service to attend ...but what Jesus said about being a friend is the thing that we need to remember.
I can't make up for lost time ...but I can do a better job being less busy and more concerned about the people that God has brought across my path in this world.
So my challenge to you is to think about your friendships ... they say people don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.

This time of year

2008-12-07T16:55:00.003-06:00

I used to always love Christmas time because of getting the gifts as a kid. Christmas '87 lives in infamy ...the year my brother and I got our Nintendo. We wore it out over the next few years. Good memories of epic battles on Tecmo bowl. That was one of the better ones ...waking up with chicken pox when I was 10 would be one of the worst!
Now it's funny how all that has evolved. I am all grown up ...(at least I appear so :)
I can't wait to see my kids' faces on Christmas ...to see their surprise and excitement that I must have shown my parents all those years ago ...I resolve to slow down this year and enjoy the magic of children's smiles ...
Coming up I promise some more holiday memories ...

Creativity

2008-11-11T22:54:00.002-06:00

I decided to try a new look ...templates are cool for us bloggers that barely have enough time to blog ...let alone create a custom look.
It actually fits this time of year I think. Can you believe we are almost through 2008?
Won't be long now ...I look forward to the possibilities of the new year.

Too Busy?

2008-11-10T09:17:00.001-06:00

So the other day I was attending a meeting and the speaker said he was tired of getting the excuse from people due to "I'm busy". His point was ...we're all busy! The truth is I can't remember when I actually didn't have a hundred things on my mind! So where does the madness end? Can we actually keep our wits and still keep things going without dropping the ball?

Here are some things that I have learned that help:

1. Keep a good calendar. -we have so many great things that can help. ical, outlook, etc.

2. Prioritize everything

3. Learn to say no.- If you are always creating schedule conflicts maybe you are having trouble saying no to requests. Sometimes they are unavoidable however, most of the time we need to check the calendar before we readily say yes to a task.

4. Ask God for wisdom- Always keep asking for how to better use His wisdom in all you do.

All for now, Godspeed.